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For example, in Year 1 that useless letter "c" would be dropped to be replased either by "k" or "s", and likewise "x" would no longer be part of the alphabet.

The only kase in which "c" would be retained would be the "ch" formation, which will be dealt with later.

Year 2 might reform "w" spelling, so that "which" and "one" would take the same konsonant, wile Year 3 might well abolish "y" replasing it with "i" and iear 4 might fiks the "g/j" anomali wonse and for all.

Jenerally, then, the improvement would kontinue iear bai iear with iear 5 doing awai with useless double konsonants, and iears 6-12 or so modifaiing vowlz and the rimeining voist and unvoist konsonants.

Bai iear 15 or sou, it wud fainali bi posibl tu meik ius ov thi ridandant letez "c", "y" and "x" -- bai now jast a memori in the maindz ov ould doderez -- tu riplais "ch", "sh", and "th" rispektivli.

Fainali, xen, aafte sam 20 iers ov orxogrefkl riform, wi wud hev a lojikl, kohirnt speling in ius xrewawt xe Ingliy-spiking werld.



I know this is a popular joke, but with English spelling failing to adapt to the great vowel shift and pronunciation shifting in other ways as well (like no longer pronouncing the k in knight), you might as well apply these rules. They make no less sense than the current spelling, and perhaps the removal of unnecessary letters makes the situation even slightly better as well.

With some kids even learning to read English by learning the general shape of the words rather than the individual letter pronunciations (based on some flawed research), I wouldn't mind a general spelling reform to bring the situation under control.


Yeah yeah yeah but this starts to fall apart on the second wave. Why would you get rid of y? The last thing we need is fewer vowel glyphs.

This is just a fun little writing and should not be used to imply anything.


> aafte

Uses long a instead of æ and removes the r from the end for vowel coloring? How would you separate pastor from pasta? I refuse to accept this reform based on its regional bias.


The further down you got, the more like German it sounded as I was mentally pronouncing it--but it was somehow a smooth gradient. Weird!


Which was exactly de point of de joke originally.


Did you transform the text to Esperanto orthography? Nice.




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